Not much going on

I guess I should update since it has been so long. There is not a lot going on lately. School is out for the summer, and Chandler is handling the change well so far. Gracie has started dance class now. Her first class was yesterday, and she did awesome. It was hard to get her to go without me, but once she was in the class, it went very well. I would have given anything to have been a fly on the wall to see how she did. I posted pictures below of the special occasion. I just can't believe how big she is getting. I am losing the little baby that I once had and now she is becoming the little girl that I always wanted. I miss my baby though. I miss the way she needed me for everything and how she was dependant on me for things. It is hard to let go of the things like that. And it kills me to think that I may not ever experience these things again. I just don't know if we will ever have another child. Maybe it is not God's plan, maybe I should just be happy with what I have got. I feel so torn because Daniel and I want another child so badly, but then again, maybe it's not in our cards. So are we supposed to keep trying and stressing and going through the let down each month, or do we just give up and make the most of what we have now? I don't expect and answer, I just need to air this crap.

We are taking the kids to the lake on Saturday. I figure we need to get Chandler in the water and since our pool is not ready yet, we'll go and make a day of it. He was supposed to do aquatics therapy this summer, but he can't do it until we get his tummy straightened out.

Summer is finally here, it has been high 90's all week. And with the humidity and heat index, you can call it over a hundred. It's sad when I have to wait till almost 9 pm to mow the yard, but it beats going out and baking in the heat. On the other hand this weather has been awesome for my tomatoes. I may just have to post a picture of them. This is the first year I have ever had luck with tomatoes. As it looks now, I will have enough to share with the neighbors! I know my Granddad could use them. He is getting too old to take care of his garden this year and it is really bothering him to see everyone else's gardens doing so well. But at 94, he really should be ready to sit back and relax some, you'd think.

On the TTC front, today is AF day, I am sure she will be here before night fall. And what is weird is that I really could care less. Back to trying as soon as she leaves I guess. It's just weird how some months it can make me an emotional wreck and others....woopty doo. I know I haven't been on PW much lately. I still lurk, but just don't post real often. I just need some time to think. But I still pray for you girls every night.

Everyone take care and have a great weekend!